Using contraceptives for the first time can be daunting and stressful. Before you rush out for those contraceptives ask yourself "Am I really ready for sex?" Running through these few questions with a simple YES or NO answer may help you to be really sure:

* Is someone putting the hard word on you to have sex, especially your boyfriend?

* Do you want to have sex before marriage or before living with someone?

* Are you forcing the sex issue with your partner?

* Do you know the person you are considering having sex with really, really well?

* Are you absolutely certain that your intended sex partner doesn't have (or has never had) a sexually transmitted disease (STD), or even HIV/AIDS? No it won't just 'go away'.

* Are you sure that YOU don't have an STD that you could pass on? Almost 30% of sexually active teens contracted a new STD within a mere six months, even among condom users (Archives of Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine, Sept 1995)

* If this relationship does not last, will I be glad that I had sex with this person?

* If I do get pregnant, (it only takes one sperm!) am I ready to be a single parent and can I afford it on my own?

* If I can't face becoming pregnant right now, can I go through with an abortion or give my baby up for adoption?

Any 'No's in there? Or maybe you have doubts about continuing to be sexually active? If so, stand tall and take charge of your life at this point. It is responsible and sensible to wait till the timing is better for YOU. Just because 'you've done it a few times already' doesn't mean you can't stop for a while now (hopefully you aren't pregnant yet and you don't have an STD)

If you have been sexually active, just pop into a clinic and get checked out. There are plenty of places and people to talk to these days if you are confused about your relationship or sexual habits.

Trust your intuition- if it doesn't feel right- it ISN"T- you don't have to know why in your head.

Abstinence is practised by some young people so the use of contraceptives is not an issue for them yet ( if you want to try it- make it easier for yourself by avoiding situations where your hormones are at an unfair disadvantage, like the back seat of a car or a bedroom at a friend's party!)

"But we don't go all the way"

If you are having oral sex you can catch an STD. If you are engaging in mutual masturbation, sperm from hands can get into the vagina then they swim like hell so you CAN get preggers this way AND the little devils can get through clothing too, that's why condoms are made of non porous, non woven material! If you think anal sex is safe- guess what? Those little spermies can spill over into your vagina then off they swim in search of your egg. These and other similar practices mean you ARE having sex so don't kid yourself that you're abstaining! You are also still at risk of pregnancy and/or sexually transmitted diseases.

If he is 'putting it in' halfway, pulling out before ejaculating or even if you are letting him 'put it in' for a second- you are having sex and you can get pregnant or catch a disease that, if untreated, could cause permanent damage to your reproductive system or even death in severe cases.

If you are absolutely determined to have sex, then find out all you can about birth control options and please BE SMART - not reckless with your sexual habits. Dying of AIDS can be agonising and bringing up a child alone is a huge responsibility.

If you wish to use an oral contraceptive pill as well as condoms, (because if it's not on, 'it's not on!' right?) then please read the information about the various types and their side effects (see sidebar headings on the RHS of this site) before discussing what's best for YOU with your doctor.

Knowledge is power- ASK QUESTIONS and don't be intimidated, it's your body and you're the one who will have to cop the consequences of your decisions, possibly for the rest of your life.

When the time is right- enjoying a great sex life with a great partner is wonderful but...you are a goddess- be smart, be safe and be choosy!